The Dog Between You and Home

Yesterday I came out of my house and saw a boy riding his bicycle. In front of him seemed to be his friend and behind him was an ugly dog. The dog seemed like a cross between a labrador, a dirty mud-flap, and a deer tick. The boy was shouting the dogs name telling it to go home. This boy seemed to be going to his friends house and when his mud-flap dog followed him, he shouted at the dog to go home but kept on pedaling. This boy and dog were coming from a road where the nearest house was half-mile away yet, he still kept glancing back to see if the dog had a revelation and gone home.

This boy had an altered perception that if the dog was not “with him”, it was not his responsibility.

It struck me that a lot of people think their presence dictates whether or not they have a responsibility. If I’m present, I’ll take that responsibility. If I’m not there, it’s not my responsibility. The truth is that nearness assumes responsibility but distance does not relieve you of it.

People do this all the time.

-“If I’m not there, I don’t have the responsibility to turn in my homework.”

-"If I'm not at rehearsal, they will be fine." (Well, they might

be, but it's still your responsibility to show up and do your part!)

-“If I’m not at work, it’s not my job.” (Golf anyone?)

-“If I’m not there, that kids not my problem.”

-“If mom or dad or grandpa or grandma are too old or too sick to take care of themselves, we’ll put them in a nursing home.”

-“If I don’t answer a text or a phone call, whatever is on the other end is not my responsibility.” (Yeah, it could be, "Honey I'm pregnant," but it could also be, "Honey, I found your twenty-dollar Harriet Tubman in the couch cushion!")

-“If I don’t answer that knock on my door or open that letter, it’s like I didn’t get it.” (How'd my bill get that high?)

But let this eternally weighty truth stick with you. Distance doesn’t dissolve responsibility. Distance may disillusion you into thinking so, but just because you can't see something doesn't mean you aren't responsible to it. How's that working with your bank account?

Andy Stanley says, “You irresponsibility eventually becomes some else’s responsibility.” This is the part that some of you may have needed to hear all year.

That job that you’re not wanting to do, that’s yours. You are responsible to IT and everyone you work for and with. Those text messages someone sent you awaiting a reply, they’re yours. That’s your responsibility. Those children that you haven’t seen or spoken to, they’re yours. They are your responsibility, not just that of whoever is "with them". That husband or wife that you’re spending less and less time with? They are yours. You relationship is your responsibility and you can't run away from that. That parent or grandparent that is in a nursing home or lives alone? They are your responsibility. And that face and body that you look at in the mirror, guess what? He or she is your responsibility too. If you don't take care of yourself, no one else will, but that's also no excuse to neglect someone else.

Need a break or a time to recharge? There are little ways to do that. Exercise. Take a vacation. Go out for a night. Immerse yourself in music deeper than you ever have! Music is the only escape that I have no regrets about. But please, stop pedaling away. Turn to what is your responsibility and embrace it. Distance doesn’t dissolve your responsibility, but the distance that you try to put between you and your responsibilities define your courage and your character. Go. Embrace what is yours.